Sunday, June 03, 2007

NO ONE CALLS ME CUPCAKE

Isn't this a great name for a book? or a blog? or a poem? in anycase I am copyrighting it as we speak. it's mine!
It popped into my head the other day.I opened the cupboard ( another funny word) and looked up at the cupcake liners. and i thought " no one calls me 'cupcake'. or 'sweetie', or 'sugar', or 'honey', or 'muffin' , or 'darling', or any of the terms of endearment.
I miss that. not that I ever had a lot of it, growing up my stepfather called me "pussy cat" one time . I held on to that like it was a beautiful white angora kitten. It was mine . It was a gift of love. rare for my stepfather as he wasn't prone to superlatives of any kind.
My husband called me "darling" and i called him "darling" we used it everyday. i don't recall any other term of sweetness we shared even though there was lots of love in our home. I called my children "pumpkin", "sweetie pie" ,"baby", " sweat pea" , "angel", "darling"," dolly","princess" and others i'll remember tomorrow.
I also rhyme names. " kiki leaky", emmy bemmy". "missy moo" and the like.........
you get the idea.
When i first moved to Newfoundland I was startled by the common usage of terms of endearment used by everyone, including strangers. If you took a taxi , the driver would address you as "my love", the waitress at the restaurant would call you "duckie". in the run of a day you might be called "old dear" "my old trout"," my love","my dear" , "my doll" , my darling" any number of times by anyone you spoke to.
When I was a lawyer I'd have clients refer to me as "girl", "my doll", "my love" my honey" all the time. I never took offence to it, especially when it came from and older gentleman. it was a lovely custom.
I dont' hear it often any more. What I do hear is a lot of public cursing, especially from the young. And now I even hear it on the radio and tv.it isn't that I don't use it , I certainly do. I started late in life. when I was at law school actually. It helped to blow off steam. for the most part I'm very careful where and when i curse, but you know it has a way of slipping out.
Getting back to terms of endearment. The summer we were married , we came to stay with my mother in law. I was a little alarmed that she frequently called me "maid". She would say "set the table maid", "run upstairs and put some lipstick on maid", " fetch the clothes off the line maid". When I complained to my husband that his mother treated me like a maid, he explained that everyone in Newfoundland calls a woman "maid" regardless of her age , just as a man was refered to as "bye" as in the traditional folk song : "I'se the bye who builds the boat, I'se the bye who sails her". It is a lovely custom. It conveys to perfect strangers they are loved. What more could anyone want?
See ye later "me old trout"................
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