tuesday, jan 23,2007
i am not having a good day.
i think it may have to do with lack of sugar. i'm a sugar aholic. i know there is such a thing and i am she. since giving up smoking many, many years ago, i have developed an unhealthy sweet tooth. i have gained and lost a copious amount of weight.
i have belonged to weight watchers off and on as long as i can remember.i wish they had issued shares. i would be rich from the dividends.
i have been on a 'binge' for just over a month. i fell off the wagon when the christmas eating season began. for me that was dec 15th. one friend invited me for lunch and another for supper on the same day. a prudent person would have declined one of the invitations.
not me! i live alone and don't particularly like to cook for myself. plus i view eating out as time out from an otherwise controlled eating pattern.
that was the beginning of the end. i ate lots of chocolates,a whole fruitcake by myself, and anything else that came handy to my mouth.
i (gratefully) was invited to many christmas parties and didn't skimp on anything , especially if it contained sugar.
as a result , i felt terribly out of shape. my back acted up and i developed a chronic headache.so yesterday i decided, one day at a time, i would try to get off sugar. i managed to do so yesterday, even though i spent the day baking (for a sick friend) and went to my daughters for supper with the left over belgian (dark)chocolate scallop shells filled with pistachio pudding and a pan of lemon squares. and i resisted even a teeny taste of the vanilla ice cream i scooped up for my grand son , or the jelly beans my granddaughter recieved for peeing in her potty( even though we forgot to put the pot in under the seat).
i was stoic. i had a bowl of cereal sweetened with 'splenda' for my snack while i watched the amazing film"dogville".
this morning , it's hitting home. i'm edgey and angry. i had a fight (onesided) with aliant my high speed internet server, who has not been serving me very well. i decided i would not let it ruin my day of doing nothing , so i took the dog on a very long walk. on route, we passed quite a few dogs out in the freezing cold on very short leashes and no water in sight. what is wrong with people who would put a dog out on a day like today. the temperature is well below zero? i don't get it ! you have children, you bundle them up on a cold day and keep an eye on them. yet these same people will put the dog(or cat) out in an arctic climate and drive off to work for the day. it makes me so mad!
so this is it the sober sugar-holic, hung over, mad , and hurting everywhere. in the cupboard i have a box of "nature valley" sweet and salty almond coated yogurt bars singing their siren song: "eat me, eat me"
i will not look their way..........
i am not having a good day.
i think it may have to do with lack of sugar. i'm a sugar aholic. i know there is such a thing and i am she. since giving up smoking many, many years ago, i have developed an unhealthy sweet tooth. i have gained and lost a copious amount of weight.
i have belonged to weight watchers off and on as long as i can remember.i wish they had issued shares. i would be rich from the dividends.
i have been on a 'binge' for just over a month. i fell off the wagon when the christmas eating season began. for me that was dec 15th. one friend invited me for lunch and another for supper on the same day. a prudent person would have declined one of the invitations.
not me! i live alone and don't particularly like to cook for myself. plus i view eating out as time out from an otherwise controlled eating pattern.
that was the beginning of the end. i ate lots of chocolates,a whole fruitcake by myself, and anything else that came handy to my mouth.
i (gratefully) was invited to many christmas parties and didn't skimp on anything , especially if it contained sugar.
as a result , i felt terribly out of shape. my back acted up and i developed a chronic headache.so yesterday i decided, one day at a time, i would try to get off sugar. i managed to do so yesterday, even though i spent the day baking (for a sick friend) and went to my daughters for supper with the left over belgian (dark)chocolate scallop shells filled with pistachio pudding and a pan of lemon squares. and i resisted even a teeny taste of the vanilla ice cream i scooped up for my grand son , or the jelly beans my granddaughter recieved for peeing in her potty( even though we forgot to put the pot in under the seat).
i was stoic. i had a bowl of cereal sweetened with 'splenda' for my snack while i watched the amazing film"dogville".
this morning , it's hitting home. i'm edgey and angry. i had a fight (onesided) with aliant my high speed internet server, who has not been serving me very well. i decided i would not let it ruin my day of doing nothing , so i took the dog on a very long walk. on route, we passed quite a few dogs out in the freezing cold on very short leashes and no water in sight. what is wrong with people who would put a dog out on a day like today. the temperature is well below zero? i don't get it ! you have children, you bundle them up on a cold day and keep an eye on them. yet these same people will put the dog(or cat) out in an arctic climate and drive off to work for the day. it makes me so mad!
so this is it the sober sugar-holic, hung over, mad , and hurting everywhere. in the cupboard i have a box of "nature valley" sweet and salty almond coated yogurt bars singing their siren song: "eat me, eat me"
i will not look their way..........
posted by bluebird of paradise at 9:14 AM
2 Comments:
we are all self-medicating a little more this time of year, it seems. I have also been looking for my equilibrium in the all the wrong places. I have not found it in the pantry yet, but that doesn't keep me from looking. ;-)
Either eat the damn things or throw them in the garbage...and cover them with something icky. Until you get vicious with yummies they'll haunt you. Myself...I just don't like to make a fuss so I eat them.
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